There is a man in Missouri whose feet are so large that he has to put his trousers on over his head.1
A Kentucky Shoemaker, for the sake of economy, has his sign painted thus:
E BROWN’SHO— PA West Virginia man is so peculiarly affected by riding on a train that he has to chain himself to a seat to prevent his jumping out of the car window.2
People in Madison county, Ky., who have paid their taxes are entitled to be married free by the sheriff.
An Illinois farmer owns a hen which lays twin eggs every day.
Geigersville, Ky., is the birthplace of a boy who was an inveterate tobacco chewer before he was a year old.
An Alabama father has taught all his children to read with their books upside down.
A Mississippi woman, who chews tobacco and drinks whisky, thinks that women have all the “rights” they need.
A Minnesota girl of 15 can distinguish no color, everything being white to her, and she is compelled to wear dark glasses to protect her eyes from the glare.
Young Darling killed a man in Washington county, Ky., the other day, and Love Divine stole a wagon load of tools in Fayette county.
The servants in a school for girls in Connecticut, while cleaning up the rooms after school closed, discovered 3,678 wads of chewing gum stuck about in various places.3
A Florida negro is growing fat on snake steaks.
One county in Pennsylvania has contributed two members to congress, two to the state senate and two convicts to the penitentiary.4
A Mississippi river steamboat roustabout drinks a half gallon of whisky every day.
A South Carolina widow became her own mother-in-law recently. That is to say, she is now the wife of her husband’s father.5
A New Hampshire girl of 23 never tasted hot bread until three weeks ago, when she stopped with friends at a Boston hotel.6
A dude in Philadelphia was turned out of the club to which he belonged because he paid his tailor’s bill two days after he got his clothes.7
An Idaho school teacher enforces obedience with a revolver.
A Baptist preacher in Georgia refuses to baptize except in running water.
An Arkansas hunter has a hound that will catch his tail in his teeth and roll down a hill faster than any other hound in the pack can run.8
A Maine mother has an old slipper, still in use, which has spanked six generations of her family.9
Michigan has a man who is so fat that he can’t fall down hard enough to hurt himself. He is known as the human spheroid.
A Delaware peach grower has found an apple with fuzz on it growing on a peach tree.
An Indiana calf, now two months old, has hoofs like a horse.
A Chicago man paid his first visit to St. Louis in July, and he liked it so well that he has gone there to live.10
A Texas preacher threw a Bible at a deacon who started to run away with the collection, and knocked him down the front steps of the church, breaking his leg in two places.11
All footnotes are mine.
- Oh really![back]
- Wonder what he’d think about airplanes?[back]
- They counted them all?![back]
- These days, they’d be the same two people.[back]
- At least she’s not her own grammaw.[back]
- Didn’t they have ovens in New Hampshire?[back]
- Can’t have any responsible parties here![back]
- I’d like to see that.[back]
- I wonder if it’s still in use?[back]
- This is news?[back]
- That was some throw![back]